I am Connected

 

I have not always been able to confidently say "I am connected". The concept of being and feeling connected has created conflicting emotions and turmoil for me in the past. As I look back, I understand now how my brain health played a big role in my ability to feel connected. 

Even with my understanding and acceptance of our connection within the universe, there were times when I had a difficult time applying it to myself. This created an internal battle within causing me to feel out of place or disconnected from everyone around me. I even wondered if I might actually be an alien being from an alternate universe. The extreme degree to which I felt separate was overwhelming at times.

Thankfully this feeling has long since been resolved. Even as I write this though, I am reminded how easily it is to fall back into those same negative feelings. My brain health requires regular care and exercise to help overcome its pattern of anxiety and depression. And Kung Fu assists me in this. Kung Fu has been more than I ever could have imagined and has provided me with the most surprising assortment of tools and support to help me work on improving my brain health. 

Connections are amazing and everywhere. I know that consistently eating healthy translates to more energy, better sleep, and improved overall health. Injuries or chronic issues within my body can cause the supporting muscle groups to compensate and become sore as well, creating a snowball effect if not addressed. Being connected requires that I stop being a passive participant and become an active, caring participant in life.

The choices I make in any given moment have huge potential to create positive ripples or negative ripples. Not seeing the immediate connections and results does not mean that there isn't a hive of activity taking place below the surface. I am developing not only increased awareness of connections, but also the willingness, drive and consistency to follow through.

 Yes, I am connected! I am connected to each and every living being on the planet and throughout the universe. Every action I take, every thought I have creates energy which ripples through my body, mind and spirit and out into the universe. And I am responsible for those thoughts and actions, recognizing that they not only affect me but others as well.

“We are all connected; to each other, biologically. To the earth, chemically. To the rest of the universe atomically. We are not figuratively, but literally stardust.” ~ Neil DeGrasse Tyson

Gumption Traps

We are often presented with life lessons which provide us with opportunities to learn and grow. Sometimes the lessons are relatively small and easy to deal with, or may even pass by without our  awareness. Others can have the ability to stop us in our tracks quite abruptly. I recognize these as gumption traps as first described by author Robert Pirsig, and lessons with tons of potential. 

"Gumption is your initiative, your energy to move forward and your ability to do so with common sense and shrewdness. Gumption is the drive that pushes you to start a project and also the focus, clarity and motivation that carries you through until you finish it."

We have just barely begun the Year of the Tiger and I've already had a couple of obstacles placed in front of me. I really believe these happen for a reason. I can view them as roadblocks or I can take more of an inquisitive approach and recognize I have been gifted with potential lessons to be learned and further personal growth.

Chronic knees issues have caused me to have to adjust my desired level of daily training. I had a plan in mind. However I didn't confer with my knees and unfortunately they are not on board. I had to quickly listen to my body and adjust my expectations. Doing consistent daily physio exercises has helped with some minor improvements over the past year, but the consistent strain put on the knees and supporting muscles as I increased my training are creating additional strain and challenges. I am currently working on the 4 basic kicks and running through all of my forms daily, along with the IHC requirements. I am planning to gradually increase the reps slowly every couple of weeks. A couple steps forward, a couple steps back and maybe even a holding pattern now and then.

I also started the year with a full set of tools to draw from which is optimal for a successful project completion. In addition to my existing set of tools, other tools were made accessible and then removed creating a gumption trap. When this roadblock presented itself I found myself processing the information. There was some frustration at first, then a measure of understanding, and then some more processing. Thus creating internal gumption traps that carry self doubt and have the ability to reduce motivation. At the end of the day I have to ask myself "do I still want to complete this project? Do I have the gumption to push forward? I know in the end these obstacles are a path to completing a quality project and in the process a better version of myself through valuable lessons and experiences.

It has been suggested that I be aggressive to help achieve my goals. Aggressiveness and assertiveness in the typical sense are not natural traits for me. I do however have gumption and a quiet determination that I believe can serve me just as well. There is so much that I can accomplish with what I have and with what is available. I am reminding myself to not under value the tools already in my tool box.

 

 

TV - Making a Change

TV has been my way of relaxing and decompressing at the end of the day for a very long time and had become a bad habit. I was finding myself staying up too late, usually binge watching something and not getting a great sleep and wasting precious hours each day.

Starting February 1st, I made a commitment to myself to stop watching TV during the weekdays. This was done in part to support my goals for the year and due to a long overdue adjustment to the amount of time I spend in front of the TV. Truly shocking how much time is wasted!

I allow myself time for TV and evening snacking on the weekends, as I also practice intermittent fasting during the week days. Right now weekends are my reward days. I know that as I build healthier practices I will naturally be able to further reduce activities and habits that don't support my intended lifestyle. The changes that I have made are sustainable and I have been pleasantly surprised to find that I really don't miss the TV during the week or the snacking at night either. 

In those newly found extra hours, I've been able to finish reading Zen and The Art of Motorcycle Maintenance and am finally finishing The 5 AM Club. Both of which were started earlier last year and then sat on a shelf until now. Relaxation is still happening and I also find myself getting to bed a bit earlier and sleeping better. I am looking forward to seeing the benefits of everything I can accomplish in those extra evening hours as the year progresses.

Numbers February 1 -15

PU - 3050                   Sparring - 86min           Spending Challenge - on track

SU - 3050                   KM - 42                         Book - on track

Hand Form - 63         AOK - 70

Weapon - 70              Yoga - 2.5 Hrs

I am Tolerant

The Pandemic is a great example and relevant to my personal growth in this area. I have always had a decent ability to show tolerance in most situations, allowing room for improvement. Charitable, patient, enduring, understanding and forgiving are words that come to mind when I think about tolerance. And the Pandemic has certainly presented us all with opportunities to practice and grow in these areas.  

I have increased my ability to look at things more gently and objectively which is greatly needed as there are too people on opposite ends of the fence, creating polarization within families and community. It can be much too easy to get caught up in the emotion and negative energy that exists on both sides. Especially when you feel passionately about something.

One of the things that I was reminded of early on in the Pandemic is the importance of understanding we are all on different life paths and planes of personal evolution. Each and everyone of us is having a similar and yet different experience depending on our personal variables and beliefs. Our past and present experiences help to create our current reality and thus our opinions and actions. A person is not necessarily wrong or right, but possibly at a different time and place in their evolution of life. 

A plant or tree for instance in nature requires sunlight, water and soil to grow. Each can thrive if given the ideal balance of basic needs for their species. As you walk in nature you will come across many variations of circumstances within an environment and subsequent plant development. Some may become more hardy because of difficult growing situations and others may become spindly and underproducing. Some species of plants are better together or can only survive by supporting each other in a symbiotic relationship. These differences make up the natural evolution of life. 

Tolerance is not about being a door mat, but rather knowing when to standing up for your beliefs or when to stand back. My voice does not always need to be heard, but I do exercise that right when it aligns with my values. And I realize that speaking my truth gently, adding words of wisdom and asking purposeful questions can provide a pathway to openness, mutual growth and understanding.

Year of the Tiger Excitement

For me, The Year of the Tiger brings tons of excitement, challenges and opportunities. Every year has this same  potential as long as I am first willing to step up to the plate. My excitement for this year actually started about 9 months ago. As Year of the Ox was evolving and my trajectory/progression was soaring upwards, I began to actually contemplate earning a Black Belt. I could envision this progression and for the first time I felt it was doable. I knew there was much work to be done, but I was becoming super pumped at the prospect. And fear was taking a back seat. As the year progressed, the feeling waned off and on, but never disappeared. I intuitively knew this was the right path to embark on.

My personal goals for year of the tiger have been well thought out to support my training as a martial artist and to continue my own personal growth. This is the first year that I feel my personal goals and IHC requirements are melding together in a way that support each other. I no longer feel the need for a separation between the two. Everything that I do that is Kung Fu related also enhances my life outside of the Kwoon. There is a circular connection between my personal goals and the IHC requirements.

My Personal Goals for Year of the Tiger

Earn my Black Belt!

50 hours of Yoga practice - I choose Yoga because of the multitude of benefits it provides to myself and to my training. The stretching, strengthening, breathing components, control, spiritual and meditation practices to start with. 

12 months of non-essential spending - Developing more intentional spending habits and awareness. Every purchase will be tracked and recorded. I feel a team/school challenge coming soon.

Write a book - This has been on my mind for a couple of years. I was finding myself jumping out of bed before I could fall asleep to jot down some thoughts and came to the conclusion that this is the year. 

I am also more organized this year than any previous year. It is still a work in progress, but that is what helps to create growth. I have notebooks for most things and am recording as much as is possible. I've already encountered some roadblocks. The extra training that I am doing is not being kind to my knees and so I have had to slow some training down. I am not able to do what was planned. I had this very brief moment of "O my gosh, what was I thinking?" And then quickly realized I was getting too far ahead of myself. I need to take care of the present day and the now. Work within my limitations and learn from the feedback my body is giving me. 

Here's to an amazing Year of the Tiger!

A Valuable Lesson in Intention

I had an unfortunate run in with a knife the other day. An incident with a kitchen knife that resulted in 2 cut fingers. Yes, there was blood and yes, the blood was mine.

As I was attempting to cut a spaghetti squash in half, the knife became stuck. This particular squash had a very thick skin and was not at all cooperative. The knife I was using was big and sharp so I was very much aware of the need for control and caution and therefore taking things slowly.

When I'm faced with a problem or challenge I am usually determined to figure out a solution. So, I stepped back to assess the situation. I was very cognizant of the need to take my time with the knife, using caution and control. Taking no chances as there was the potential for a very bad outcome, I proceeded carefully.  

After seeing that the knife wasn't budging I added a second smaller knife into the equation. I was able to insert the second knife at the opposite end providing me with 2 handles to grasp, thus adding more leverage and control. A solution seemed to be at hand. I stepped back one final time after inserting the second knife and when ready, grasped both knife handles. Imagine all that caution just to have it go terribly wrong. The underside of my 2 middle fingers sliced open... just like that! 

Interesting fact: I don't mind blood so much. It's the open wound itself that causes me distress. I may have need stitches, but wasn't going to look close enough so just applied pressure and later some steri-strips. I did get that squash split and learned a valuable lesson in the process. 

What went wrong? Well, as I went to grasp the handle of the bigger knife, I actually grabbed closer to the blade, immediately cutting into the fingers. My intention had gone awry and without realizing I was already thinking about prying the two halves apart and not paying attention. Making a stupid mistake. My intention had been spot on up to that point. Then poof!! Instead of being in the moment I had jumped ahead to the finish line that was so, so close.

Successful completion of a goal is very much tied to my intention and the ability to make adjustments while in the moment. Where am I, what am I doing, and how am I going to get there are all questions that I need to be asking myself consistently.

Intention requires awareness, presence, fluidity, processing quickly or taking time to step back and assess a situation and remaining open to possibilities and adaptations.

 

I am a Gift

I am reminded of the importance of valuing oneself. Too often as humans we under value our own importance and the positive effect we can have on those around us.  Often we are the hardest on ourselves and forget to consistently practice self love and appreciation. 

A persons birth is the ultimate gift and a celebration of life. A gift that has the ability to continue giving and comes with an enormous responsibility. We are responsible for nurturing and loving ourselves, so that we can be a positive influence and role model to those around us.

I am a gift to myself

I love and nurture myself

I am valued for who I am

I celebrate me

I am a gift to the world

My gift of being creates ripples in everything I do 

Final Numbers - Ox Tear

 

Final numbers for Year of the Ox

No quitting ✔ 

Push ups 40,560

Sit ups 43,245

Lau Gar 1190

Shoto 1141

Sparring 137 X stopped keeping track

Kilometres 648 X stopped keeping track

Acts of Kindness 886

Mend a Relationship ✔

Journal min 1x week ✔

Featured Journal Posts ✔

Online Presence ✔

Tiger Challenge - ✔

Zero Unexcused Absences ✔ 

Excel in Curriculum - Instructors would need to judge

SRKF Projects - 2 projects, SRKF Virtual Auction & Livestream Table of Contents

Mastery - Reading most days, 5/6 complete