Fear and Strength

Getting up in front of other people and doing anything is nerve racking. We almost all have some degree of anxiety and nervousness. I personally, would go out of my way most of the time to avoid such situations in the past. Friday night's class was the sheep teams' first opportunity to stand up and preform our weapon forms for the rest of the team.

 I experience anxiety and fear on a regular basis, but this was a totally new high for me. The only thing that kept me going and able to get through it was focusing on my breathing. As I focused on breathing deeply, my anxiety, my panic, and my emotions all wanted to get the best of me. I was determined. That was not going to happen to me. So I focused on my breathing. In and out,  in and out. As I was doing that something else happened. I realized I was only focused on myself and was only partially aware of what was going on around me. I remember thinking that my team mates deserved my full attention as they entered the circle and I needed to really watch each one of them as they went through their form. Being more in the moment also helped to redirect some of my anxiety in a positive way and I am happy to say I did not pass out. In a few short weeks we have accomplished a lot. Awesome job sheep team.

"Every time your fear is invited up, every time you recognize it and smile at it, your fear will loose some of its strength." by Thich Nhat Hanh


Sit ups       1080
Pushups     675
Walking     40.8km
Kempo       25reps
Nunchuks   54reps
Aok's          12