Age, experience and wisdom has helped to increase my ability to practise forgiveness. Forgiveness towards myself and others. I've come to realize and understand how negative energy and emotion gets tangled up into an ugly knot when we withhold forgiveness. The act of forgiveness can be quite simple if we let go of negativity and replace those emotions with gratitude and love.
Letting go can be one of the most difficult tasks to undertake in our lives. And often even when we think we have been successful it lies beneath the surface creating discord or havoc when least expected. This is because we haven't replaced the negative emotions with positive ones. If I were to take a glass and fill it up with love, light and gratitude, there would be no space for anything negative or less than. Just like the glass our bodies and spirits can also be filled with love, light and gratitude. Practising forgiveness helps to fill us up with positive energy, manifesting all that we need, which then spills out into our relationships and the universe.
The Hawaiian Ho'oponopono Prayer is a beautiful, and simple tool to cleanse, purify and release negative energies while filling up your spirit and the vessel of your body with love, light and gratitude. It is that love, light and gratitude that strengthens our connections and unites us all.
I first came across the Ho'oponopono Prayer about 8 years ago and dabbled with it a bit here and there. I didn't fully understand the power of the prayer until I used it as a tool to help me with a very difficult employee. The employee and I had started our working relationship on a friendly note and ended the relationship on a very negative note.
Instead of focusing on the negative and hostile behavior, the healing prayer helped me to turn the focus inward, asking for her forgiveness. I used intention, applying the prayer/mantra to our relationship. I owned my negative energy around the situation, saying I was sorry, asking for forgiveness and being thankful for the lesson/opportunity. Finishing with love. Love towards myself and towards her. Forgiving myself helped me to also forgive her and replaced the negative energy with positive energy. I was able to let go and move forward.
I was somewhat apprehensive when I came across her in a store months later. We both could have avoided each other and yet we approach and interacted like old friends. She seemed happy to see me and we had a very pleasant conversation which ended with her hugging me. The negative energy and feelings had disappeared. I was blown away by the change. The weight lifted was amazing! I am forever a believer in the power of forgiveness!
Training has been so so lately. I know it is normal to have some peaks and valleys. The idea though is to be aware and recognize a plateau or a slippery slope downward so that adjustments and course corrections can be made sooner than later. I am currently navigating one of those slippery slopes.
A large portion of my mental and emotional energy had been focused on my dogs health, physical condition and comfort. I was still training and keeping up with everything so there were no red flags at the time. And then I started to see bit of a pattern of lower numbers as I logged each day. Things not getting completed. I know from past experience that awareness often happens after the fact. After momentum has already started its downward trajectory.
This past week our dog passed, and I allowed myself permission to ease off a bit on the push ups and sit ups. My numbers are well above where they need to be and so I felt comfortable with not completing as much on some days. My knees ache every day and the pain and discomfort increases the more I use them. I found myself needing more down time. Yes, I have valid reasons and yet they can also become excuses if I let them.
In addition to faltering on some of my numbers, I even considered not blogging again this week. I really wasn’t even sure what I wanted to blog about. I’ve been having a difficult time sorting out my thoughts about where I am right now. Understandable given my current mental state. Reading and hearing from other team members about their struggles has help push me to reflect and write this blog as I am also struggling. I know how important it is to have a record of where I am, what I’m doing and be honest with myself.
Even though my trajectory has been off, I have anchors/tools that helped to keep me from falling off the completely. I have 4 primary anchors that I find helpful. An anchor can be something that weighs you down, dragging along where ever you go. Or an anchor can be a tool that helps to keep you on course, allowing you to complete actions and make discoveries. An anchor from a positive perspective can provide a sense of accomplishment leading towards future success.
My anchors are blogging, reciting mastery every morning and doing push ups and sit ups. The beauty of having more than one anchor to help support my journey is I have backups when one or more isn’t working. I also have experience and awareness on my side to help me recognize when I am in need of a course correction or even help from others.
I'm trying to find that balance of taking care of myself emotionally and physically while still moving forward.
I am a work in progress.
I view this as more than just gratitude. Feeling blessed takes gratitude to the next level. It is a higher level of appreciation and understanding, and a way of being. A deep experiencing of life and the ability to own and love where I am at or at least be content with where I am at. Even when I feel like I am continuously swimming with no land or finish line in sight, I feel blessed because I have the ability to see all the gifts that surround me.
The 'I am project' has fostered an increased sense of personal awareness and the development of a more positive outlook. I'd be lying if I said all has changed and life is perfect. I still struggle. My mind still tries to lead me to some negative places at times. Overall though, I am feeling calmer and less concerned with what may or may not happen in the future. I feel more grounded. There is more positive awareness and less push and pull happening.
When I stop to consider the topics I've chosen so far this year, it is not surprising that I am currently in this more grounded mental and emotional space. Simply reflecting and writing about each of these topics has nourished seeds that were already planted within me and just needing some attention.
Just a few short days ago, I had to make the very difficult decision to help our dog, Radix pass on. Radix joined our family during a very difficult time in my life and has been by my side for almost 14 years. His quality of life had diminished greatly in the past couple of months and had been on pain medication with very little effect. Each day was getting more and more difficult for him. I am heartbroken and at the same time feel blessed to have had him by my side for all those years.
