Board breaking is an important part of our curriculum and is either loved or feared by many students. I myself fall into the latter category. I've been apprehensive and stressed by the thought of breaking boards. Anxiety took over prior to our recent break-a-thon to the point where I seriously considered just sitting on the sidelines and watching everyone else. I know if I sit and watch I will feel more comfortable, but I will also regret not pushing myself and missing out on the opportunity and lessons to be learned. The rational part of my brain reminds me that #1 I've done this before successfully, #2 its not life or death and #3 I may even enjoy myself.
The pandemic has been beneficial to me in some ways. Allowing me to develop and grow safely within my bubble and reducing my anxiety. On the other hand some of the forward momentum I had gained prior to the pandemic has been lost or delayed. So it's times like board breaking that I feel like I'm starting over.
Did I successfully get through the break-a-thon with at least 10 breaks? Yes. How did I feel afterwards? A mixture of relief and also knowing it was not as bad as I envisioned in my head. I am still very uncomfortable with the idea of breaking actual boards though. Afterwards I had even voiced out loud that I would be fine not being a black belt if it meant not having to do the required board breaks. That's my anxiety speaking for me and also not true because knowing myself, I know I would never let something like the board breaks stand in my way of earning my blackbelt.
I would like to see board breaking become more than just a yearly event. Did I actually just say that? Yes, because with more practice comes more understanding, increased comfort and skill. I know our training throughout the year provides the knowledge and skill required to break boards but it often takes a physical board in front of us to learn how to overcome mental barriers and transition in class knowledge to actual skill. And practicing more often on an actual board would help to overcome some of my anxiety and mental barriers while building confidence.
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