Asking The Right Questions

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James E. Ryan is the dean of the Harvard Graduate School of Education. His latest book is Wait, What? And Life’s Other Essential Questions. In the book, he discusses 5 major questions we can use to help ourselves in our lives–

1 – Wait, what?

Spoken or unspoken, this question asks our busy selves to stop and think. We need to slow down and make sure we are understanding what is attempting to be communicated. Are we rushing to judgment before truly understanding and considering the subject at hand? Clear communication allows us to prevent needless conflicts. Invite in-depth conversation by asking good questions and allowing others to tell their stories. This creates deep bonding.

2 – I wonder (why)… OR I wonder if…

Instead of assuming, and continuing with old thought patterns, keep your curiosity active by asking why. Pause to appreciate something mysterious or miraculous. Keeping a child-like curiosity and listening to your inner urges to understand things helps you open to   possibilities.

3 – Couldn’t we at least…?

Finding common ground and focusing on forward movement, even without perfection, can lead us to more progress and more joy. This question can help us overcome initial inertia and get started on solving issues or problems. Once the ball is rolling, answers tend to show up. Pick a small, reachable goal; have some success; then tackle bigger goals.

4 – How can I help?

Helping others is noble and welcomed if it truly fits someone’s needs. Asking “How can I help?” and then truly listening allows the other person to guide you in how you can be of best service. This helps you form a connection with the other person while allowing them to feel respected. Asking “how” can also help bring better solutions. Slow down, be sincere, and allow magic to happen.

5 – What truly matters?

Ask yourself this question on a daily basis in respect to big plans and small things in your life. What is most important to you and how can you best achieve that? Break that down into various aspects and determine the specific steps of action you need take. 

I read James E. Ryan's interview transcript in which he talks about his book and these five questions. He goes into much more detail and gives examples of how each of the questions could be used and why they are so important to our daily lives. As I was reading over the questions, they all resonated with me, but #5 in particular really spoke to me. 

There is a lot of substance in each of these questions and I think it would be beneficial to take some time and reflect on each one and what they mean to us and how we can incorporate them into our lives every day. Making use of these questions regularly in our lives will help us greatly on our path towards mastery!

Michele Ward

"Horse Power"

I am very thankful to have been able to take part in Friday night's horse experience put on by Mr. McKee. Thank you Mr. McKee for providing this opportunity and sharing your time, knowledge and expertise with all of us.


When we first walked around the area to greet all the horses, I was surprised to find I picked the lead horse to work with for the night. Some of them are very similar and if I had realized Dusty was the lead horse, I probably would have steered clear of him. I not the person to take on the lead anything, most times. I'm glad everything worked out the way it did though because surprisingly enough the horse and I worked quite well together. I was actually able to communicate and get the horse to follow direction with out too much trouble. Although it could be that Dusty is just very well trained.

The blind fold exercise was great fun and riding bareback was a super end to the evening. Getting off the horse without a stool was a bit scary, but I managed to land on my feet. Yay!

respect
mood
expectations
confidence
communication
adjustments
rewards
gratitude

These are all things that we need to be aware of and practise when interacting with people or animals. We become much better teachers and even students and can accomplish so much more.

Thank you again Mr. McKee! I expanded my bubble and had a great time with the horses and the other team members.

Michele Ward

The Best Use of Time & Space

My work schedule this past week finally included two days off. I have been working 6 days a week most weeks. I really need that extra day off from time to time to accomplish things that are not a priority, but are still needing to be taken care of.

As I have mentioned before, goal setting is not something I excel at or even like. In fact, I'm down right resistant to the process and only formally set goals when necessary. Which is probably one of the reasons it took me so long to get my personal requirements in to Sifu Brinker for this years I Ho Chuan team. 

I know that with my work schedule the way it is, I need to start making lists and creating some sort of life schedule, to better organize myself and take advantage of all those little spaces of time throughout the day. Even though I know this needs to be done and will be beneficial, I have not been able to start the process. I think about it from time to time, it's in the back of my mind, but I seem to be unable to get started. 

My work schedule has started to lighten up somewhat and that is going to mean a few more hours some weeks to accomplish other things. Those extra hours will create space that needs to be used wisely, otherwise they became wasted time, which makes having a schedule and lists in place more important than ever. More time and space could actually create mediocrity if I am not careful. 

The question is... how do I get started? I think that is a big part of the problem. There doesn't seem to be a specific formula to follow and I would much rather just go with the flow. I had a feeling early on that the process of setting goals was going to become a natural outcome of being on the team this year. This is another one of those add ons that will naturally evolve over the year. 

 I think one of the reasons I am having a such a hard time with this process is just being overwhelmed with the amount of work it is going to take to create and organize a schedule and lists. Part of me would much rather not see all that needs to be taken care of. Yet, I know that because I am not as organized as I could be, I am dropping the ball at times... both big and little balls. Flow still needs to happen and that is where our ability to make adjustments to our schedule will come into play. 

After reading one of Mr. Helm's blogs yesterday, I was motivated to jot down some ideas to start adding to my lists. It felt good to do even that little bit. I would appreciate any advice and help so that I can figure all this out and continue with the process.

Michele Ward

  

Adding On

I have seen a pattern of sorts emerging over the past ten weeks. Along with my reflections each week, I find myself discovering new items to add on to the list of my personal goals. Although these add ons have not formally been added to my list, I do feel the need to informally add them to my daily routine.

On Thursday night my anxiety spiked suddenly and caused me a lot of difficulty. I spent the first half of the night's informal class in the change room. After calming down enough to venture back out onto the mats I was able to get some practice in with my cane form. The positive outcome to all this is my conversation at the end of the night with Sifu Hayes. We had a great conversation about breathing properly. Even when I think I am breathing in through my diaphragm, I am not isolating the area and I still use my chest as well. I know that when I am nervous or concentrating I also have a tendency to forget to breathe. This issue with breathing shows up when I am doing forms as well. Breathing exercises and consciously breathing as I do my forms is a goal I have now added into my daily practice.

The following items are some of the add ons I have started to incorporate:

• Breathing exercises -  practise proper breathing and consciously breathe throughout forms 
• 15 minute Qi Gong practice each day
• Positivity- recognizing negative thoughts, emotions & actions, and learning from them to create opportunity and positive outcomes for myself as well as others
• Creating lists and schedules for myself to be better organized and stay on track

As I continue on through the year I'm sure that more items will be added and my list for next years team will continue to evolve naturally.

Quite often I find myself jotting down thoughts and ideas as I am reading other team members journal posts. Journaling is an extremely powerful tool that benefits everyone. Writing and reading journal posts creates team engagement, connection and expands our knowledge. I could go on and on about the importance of journaling and the ripple effect it has. When I read other peoples journal posts I learn so much. Ideas and opportunities are created. Surrounding oneself with like minded people all striving towards mastery and doing so publicly is extremely powerful!

Michele Ward

   
                           


           

The Power and Potential of a Goal

The Suzuki family spent 10 days in 1989, visiting the village of Aucre in the Brazilian rain forest. Severn Suzuki who was 9 years old at the time returned home fearful about the future of her new friends in Aucre. She formed a club called ECO (Environmental Children's Organization) when she returned home. These 10 year old girls spoke out about nature, people, the need to protect them and overtime they were invited to visit classes and give talks.

Severn had an even bigger goal and that goal involved taking ECO to the Earth Summit in Rio de Janeiro in June 1992. With help from two philanthropists and a lot of fundraising of their own, over $13,000 was raised to help get them to Rio. These funds were also matched by her parents, David and Tara Suzuki.  

ECO rented a booth at the Earth Summit along with hundreds of other groups and talked to numerous people. These five girls from Canada were filmed and interviewed by reporters and made quite an impact. Severn was then invited to address a plenary session during the summit. With help from fellow ECO members, Severn wrote her speech and rehearsed it in the taxi ride to Rio Centro. She was the last to speak in front of a few hundred delegates.

This is some of what she said:

I'm only a child and I don't have all the solutions, but I want you to realize, neither do you. You   don't know how to fix the holes in the ozone layer. You don't know how to bring the salmon back up a dead stream. You don't know how to bring back an animal now extinct. And you can't bring back a forest where there is now a desert. If you don't know how to fix it, please stop breaking it...

In my country we make so much waste; we buy and throw away, buy and throw away. Yet northern countries will not share with the needy. Even when we have more than enough, we are afraid to lose some of our wealth, afraid to let go...

You teach us how to behave in the world. You teach us not to fight with others; to work things out; to respect others; to clean up our mess; not to hurt other creatures; to share, not be greedy. Then why do you go out and do the things you tell us not to do?...

My dad always says, "You are what you do, not what you say." Well, what you do makes me cry at night. You grownups say you love us. I challenge you. Please, make your actions reflect your words.

I'm only a child, yet I know if all the money spent on war was spent on ending poverty and finding environmental answers, what a wonderful place this Earth would be...

  Severn Cullis-Suzuki, age twelve, Earth Summit,
  Rio de Janeiro, June 1992


Spoken from the heart!


Michele Ward