Practicing Gratitude

 

I have been making more of an effort to practice gratitude each day by starting my day and ending my with gratitude. Some gratitudes are automatic and others are done with more conscious thought and consideration. This isn't happening consistently as the habit and practice is still developing, but the consistency is building as each day passes.

I am grateful for Kung Fu, our past masters and all the instructors, but I am realizing there is so much more to be aware of and grateful for. Master Brinker recently discussed some of the many benefits our forms provide. On some level I was aware of all the benefits mentioned and yet was not fully utilizing that awareness. I can now see how also practicing gratitude on a more conscious level before and during my forms practice can add another dimension to my training. For example, if I think about being grateful for the benefits of stretching within a form, I will be more aware of those moments and able to take advantage of them. In addition to the benefit of improved muscle stretches, I will have also improved my stances and as a result have even more to be grateful for.

Gratitude can exist on a surface level or a deeper more conscious level when I allow myself to be open and feel the connections that exist. Gratitude opens my eyes to the limitless potential of the universe and helps me to draw on the abundance that already exists. By practicing gratitude, I am taking my small world/bubble and expanding it to include everyone and everything. Practicing gratitude provides an abundance of positive energy to the universe for all to benefit from.

Trajectory

Here we are getting close to the end of December and the Year of the Ox is almost done. And, I now have a pretty solid picture of my trajectory over the year. Starting the year off strong helped me to build momentum and projected me forward. For the normally cautious me, it was a bit like being shot out of a cannon, in a good way.

The first 7 months were a result of conscious decisions made and actions taken. I found that being on an upward trajectory created a desire to continue the momentum and find ways to build on the results. That trajectory however didn't last when I found my emotional state and internal engine starting to sputter, running out of gas. Some obstacles can be planned for and others are more random, coming at us with no warning.

I've learned that internal, emotional and ego based stuff can be the most difficult to discern and overcome. Taking care of myself has to always be at the top of the list. And I know even when unexpected life events occur, I still have a large measure of control that will allow me to take charge. How I react, the decisions I make and the actions I take are all mine and knowing this can help me to reset and make adjustments. Practicing gratitude can help me recognize and shift my focus to the positives. Also leading a balanced, healthy lifestyle provides a solid base to operate from. 

That downward trajectory could have been much worse if I hadn't continued to blog. Keeping up with the weekly blogs helped to keep me engaged with the rest of the team. Self reflection and blogging also helped to anchor me and provide at least some forward momentum. 

Putting all of this into practice is the true test. I am encouraged though by my ability to draw on some of the tools in my tool box. Things could have been worse and all was not lost. It is simply a matter of finding even just one tool that will keep me afloat until I find a way to navigate through whatever is holding me back. 

My trajectory is what I make it and how I respond to the transitions along the way. I keep in front of me the knowledge that every obstacle put in my way provides lessons and potential growth.

Namaste everyone!

Smile!

 

This past week I've been reflecting on attitude and how much my attitude can factor into the overall tone for the day and what I am able to accomplish. 

The attitude of "Just do it" usually works for me but not always. I find it mostly a surface fix to initially get me going and often that is all I need to ignite motivation and engagement. This is also the attitude that propels me forward and keeps me stepping out of my comfort zone with or with out anxiety present. As I am getting back on track though, I still am having moments when the "Just do it" attitude is not enough. So I ask myself why?

If I'm going to step outside my comfort zone or "Just do it" when it comes to my training, I believe there is a another layer to consider with regards to attitude. A certain measure of happiness, enthusiasm and joy needs to be factored in. This can be a conscious attitude adjustment implemented at the start to help with motivation. Flipping a switch and adding a simple smile at the beginning can change the blahs or indifference and even reduce my anxiety and help propel me forward in a more positive way. I've tried this and I know it works! 

I am becoming more aware of the toll of living with chronic anxiety has taken and how it has shaped my life over the years. Don't get me wrong, there have been many accomplishments and numerous times when I successfully said yes to opportunities that were outside my comfort zone. Sometimes it is easier and other times it's a constant inner battle with myself. It's that inner battle that has the ability to diminish joy and happiness. This is because anxiety tends to put me in a type of survival mode. And it is difficult to have enthusiasm for something when you are thinking about surviving and just making it through. There is still a feeling of accomplishment at the end, but something is lost along the way.

I have learned the importance of balance in everything. I say yes to as much as I can and give myself permission to say no when it starts to become overwhelming. I am still learning where this optimum balance point is but I do feel that there has been progression in the right direction. And I am learning the value of a smile and how it can actually create positive changes both internally and externally. I am slowly moving out of the overthinking, anxious, cautious operating mode into a more gentle, joyful and inquisitive mode of being. 

Namaste everyone!

Strengths & Weaknesses

Deeper, more personal self reflection is something that I normally shy away from. Peeling that onion layer by layer can be messy and a lot of hard work. Training as a martial artist and blogging over the years has unintentionally helped me to peel my onion. 

Personal strengths and weaknesses have been at the forefront of my thoughts lately. I could most likely list a few without giving it too much thought, but have never formally asked myself what my top 5 of each are. I now have a list with 7 of each which will require some further contemplation. I may or may not whittle it down to 5 as I complete this process. 

As I read over my weaknesses, I am aware of the positive aspects contained within each one. Some could even be considered a strength in the right context and I can see opportunities for growth. Having the mindset to work with them rather than against them allows me to see the benefits in certain cases or where to pursue areas for improvement. I recognize potential and opportunity in weakness.

When I look at my strengths, I can see if taken too far they can become a weakness. There are times when a strength might need to be reigned in or I could loose myself and my ability to stay open to possibilities. Strengths can provide lessons in awareness and balance.

Both strengths and weaknesses require a self check from time to time. An awareness of where the scale sits and if any adjustments are needing to be made. Ideally I want to be in a place where I can embrace both sides as they ebb and flow.

Namaste everyone!

Personal Goals

Personal goals have been on my mind lately as I start to plan for the Year of the Tiger. I have a couple of big goals that I want to work on throughout the coming year. I know why and what I want to accomplish for each of these goals. I'm just not sure how to go about defining and measuring them yet, but I can visualize the intended benefits. 

As a past and present IHC team member, my experience has taught me that the IHC team requirements are tools and not hoops or boxes to check. However, I've never really thought of my personal goals as tools and didn't attach the same importance to them. I knew the benefits, but was still thinking about checking boxes. My perception has expanded recently and I am now seeing the bigger picture. I now realize my personal goals are tools as well and the added potential contained within each goal. 

The end result of taking advantage of a tool is not always readily apparent. Yes, I may have bigger, stronger muscles as a result of doing 50,000 pushups over the year, but there is also the knowledge gained on how to do a proper push up, obstacles overcome, determining adjustments for injuries, finding time to fit everything in, building consistency and developing perseverance. These are all valuable lessons. Not readily apparent at the start of the year and totally lost if you are just focused on checking the box.

I'm seeing my personal goals in a new light and reframing my perspective. My thought process and understanding is evolving. As I plan out my goals for next year I am more aware of the possibilities and appreciative of the coming benefits the year will bring. Now I just have to figure out how to define my goals so they can be tracked and measured.

Namaste everyone,

New Discoveries

Discovery 1

Something cool happened during last Monday's class. Our focus for the class was an application of the  triangle stepping pattern. Virtual training does have some limitations and yet there are positives as well. Not having a partner to work with provides me with time for more reps and because there is no obstacle in my way (opponent) I can feel if my momentum is broken and where it might need to be fixed. Not having to switch back and forth also gives me time to work on the other side when doing an application or technique. During Monday's class I added in some reps on my right side as well. This of course didn't feel nearly as good as the left side. The first 3 - 4 reps were pretty choppy and lacked any kind of flow. As soon as I got a bit more comfortable with my right side, I discovered that the knife hand felt better. I realized that I was more open and more committed. All 4 quadrants were working together better. Hmm..., interesting! The left side had been feeling really good. Working on the right side helped me to realize where I need to make some adjustments to get my 6 harmonies and the 4 quadrants working better.

I am seeing the benefit of taking some time to train on my not so good side. It helps to amplify areas that are not working. In addition it also amplifies sections that stand out as aha moments. I think the reason this works so well is because it is awkward and everything is slowed down. Both the good and bad is enhanced.

Discovery 2

The front thrust kick in Lao Gar 1 has been giving me some trouble for a while. Even though I felt like I was releasing after the knife hand, I couldn't get the kick to feel like it had much power. It always felt forced. As I was training today, I took a moment to think about what a front thrust kick feels like during our warmups. I tried a few and came away with the realization that when doing the front thrust kick in Lao Gar 1, I was only releasing my knife hand before the kick and forgetting about the rest of the body. Applying some basics and concepts from our practice drills has helped greatly and I now feel like I have it figured out. The kick feels much better now.

Namaste everyone!

Blogging is Like Meditation

I find blogging to be a form of meditation. Often when I sit down to compose a blog there are numerous thoughts floating through my head and I don't always have a clear picture. I am forced to stop, reflect and arrange my thoughts in some sort of coherent order and cohesiveness. 

There are usually always moments of stillness in my writing process where I close my eyes, breathe and allow thoughts and feelings to surface. And when I get stuck, I'll ask for guidance. This is not a quick process and usually involves deeper reflection which can also lead to new discoveries as a result. When this happens, my original blog subject can change completely or I have to reign in the new discoveries, jotting them down to revisit when the time is right. 

Working through the writing process helps me to expand my thoughts, feelings and experiences. I am able to create a more focused picture of where I am at, where I've been and where I am going. I've had aha moments while writing, where a piece of the puzzle suddenly fits. These are some of the best moments and would not have been possible if I hadn't taken the time to sit down and put in a bit of effort.

Namaste everyone!

Thirst for Knowledge

Quite often I overthink and can easily end up down the rabbit hole as a result. This thinking can also take over my ability to feel and develop awareness and to trust in myself. Becoming stuck on something has also been known to happen on occasion. 

I have been working on being aware of when my thinking is starting to take over so that I can reign it in and take a different approach. Instead allowing my body to just feel and do what comes naturally. This process is difficult for me, but I know that I will be a better martial artist and person as a result.

I am not trying to eradicate my habit of overthinking, just bring it under control. I want to still be able to take advantage of the benefits that overthinking and deep thinking provide and create a better balance between thinking and doing. 

Whether a particular character trait is seen as positive or negative there are always pros and cons. I see the cons when it comes to my Kung Fu training. Getting stuck on something and not being able to move forward can definitely be a problem. Lately though I am also becoming cognizant of the positive aspects.

For me, overthinking creates a thirst for knowledge. A need to understand the hows and whys which also then helps to expand my knowledge and understanding. I am also more aware and appreciative of observations and aha moments discovered along the way. Details are revealed and awareness developed. It may even help me to be a better teacher at some point in the future. 

Question to ponder:

If a person understands the basic concepts and moves naturally without thinking will they also have a natural ability to know and understand the hows and whys within those movements? Or would the hows and whys need to be learned? 

Namaste everyone!

All about the Hips

I am loving my hips! Thanks to a class taught by Sifu Hayes last month. His instruction was a gift that keeps on giving. One of those golden key opportunities which happen at different times for everyone. We had started class turning 180 degrees in a bow stance, which led into working on our cat stance transitions. This then led to removing our arms from the equation as we made our transitions which changed the cat stance for me. That's a whole other blog. Transitions and centering appeared to be the lesson. When discussing this with Sifu Ward, he felt the lesson was mostly about the hips. After I played around with this some more and concentrated on my hips, I could feel the hips lining up with the 6 harmonies. 

I have slowly been exploring various techniques, keeping more of the focus on my hips and letting them do the driving. This has helped a lot when turning out of an open x while doing Lao Gar. As long as I let my hips drive, the stability is much improved. I have also started to focus on this with my kicks and am seeing some improvement.

I think I was a newer green belt when I truly discovered my shoulders and how they moved in relation to the rest of my body. My hips though weren't even on my radar at the time. They had been functioning alright, but awareness and harmony needed work. It was Tai Chi where I first experienced the disconnect with my hips and started to develop some awareness. It always felt like more of a timing issue though. 

Hmm.. interesting thought just now. It still could be a timing issue, but with a different way of thinking. Instead of only working on perfecting the timing maybe I need to look at the underlying cause of the timing issue. What drives the timing? Oh my! Could it be the hips? Yay, something to explore further.

Namaste everyone!

 

Immediate Gratification

Immediate gratification creeps into my life too frequently and with little thought. I have been thinking about this for a while now and what it all means to me personally. It is becoming more and more clear over the past 14 days some of the areas I have allowed mediocrity to insert itself into my life without realizing it. 

I am following a detox/cleansing regime with Sifu Cosgrove's assistance and I am extremely grateful for this opportunity. While it might not have been the best timing, I am not one to pass up an opportunity. My work schedule has been crazy busy and I haven't had a day off in 11 days now and with another 5 days to go until I finally get a break. Most of these days are full days with a couple of half days to fit in some errands and appointments. 

The whole detox thing came about quickly and not a lot of time to prepare so extra time is needed most days to prep food. Avoiding dairy, gluten and meat with the detox and being so busy with work, there have been times when the pull of a quick fast food meal was very appealing. It's all about immediate gratification and yet I have managed to stay true to the diet plan. There have been a few minor slips at home, but at least done consciously and in moderation. 

Examples are everywhere and it is often about convenience. I see all the liquor stores everywhere, the smaller drug stores popping up all over, cannabis stores and have even noticed lately new tire and lube shops. Why do we need so much of everything? It's over-consumerism and convenience. Instead of having to drive 10 minutes down the road, what you need is now 2 minutes away. 

I also see examples of people and businesses not recycling. Not taking the time to put protocols and systems into place to take care of simple things. My newest job throws out numerous batteries into their regular garbage and tosses out recyclable bottles. The recycle depot is a block away. Oh my! That has to change. I am planning to help them implement some changes for the better. I'm not perfect either and know that there are things that I do better myself when it comes to recycling, reducing and reusing. 

Living intentionally is the answer. We are all human and so immediate gratification will not be completely erased. There are times when being spontaneous and saying yes can be a good thing. The more we can practice delaying gratification to make conscious choices, the greater the rewards will be. Immediate gratification is short lived and often comes with negative consequences. Being aware is a good start to making better choices and creating intentional living for the betterment of ourselves and environment.

Namaste everyone!

  

Update

Oh my! I would have never thought it would be so difficult to get back on track. How hard can it be to just jump back in where I left off?  I had a great thing going and then all of a sudden I didn't. My depression has eased and overall mood has improved. I've managed to add some training and requirements back into my daily routine, but can't seem to get the consistency and numbers where I would like them to be. I am struggling still, but making some progress. I have to remember that steps forward are better than none at all. 

There was a little light bulb moment the other day when I realized that I needed to start reading Mastery again every morning. This is something that had fallen off with everything else. I do believe there is a correlation between reading Mastery and pushing myself to live the messages within. So today I made a point of reading it before I left for work and will continue to do so every day. Maybe this was the missing piece to getting fully and completely back on track.

Namaste everyone!

Redefining my Training

For the first 7 months of the year I had a workable routine which served me well. My Engagement and motivation was spot on most of the time with a few minor glitches here and there. These glitches were recognized and adjustments made. I had also considered how my training would be affected once I started to work more regular hours and what adjustments could be made. What I hadn’t considered was internal factors. Internal factors can be harder to recognize even though it is our own personal reactions to events. One would think if it is happening within, we would be the first to know. This is not always the case.

Developing my eye for detail, awareness, trust, and feeling if some is right or not while doing my forms also needs to transfer over to other areas of my life. This will help with recognizing and addressing the internal factors earlier. We don’t practice Kung Fu just to leave it at the door. Kung Fu and life are intertwined and gradually become one with each other. The lessons learned are applicable to all aspects of our daily lives. I am understanding and experiencing this at a deeper level as I continue through this year. 

I know that if something happens beyond my control, limiting my ability to train then it is beneficial to have built up extra reps in different areas of training. Where my perspective fell off was in thinking that those extra reps could also provide extra days off, providing a convenient excuse not to train. There is a shift happening now in the way I view my Kung fu training. Instead of planning not to train at some point in the future, my perspective has changed to developing sustainable, effortless action that builds consistency.

Namaste everyone!

Believing in Myself

The primary theme for me this year has been about self awareness, and believing and trusting in myself and my Kung Fu. These are themes that have presented themselves consistently over the year and because of this have naturally become integrated into my training and day to day life.

Because I am my own worst critic I don't always recognize the steps or leaps forward. This year though I am experiencing more and more how my body moves and feels. Is there ease of movement? Is there room for improvement? What went wrong? Those aha moments! These all happen because I am listening to my body. The difficult piece sometimes is trusting in what I am feeling and not overthinking or doubting myself. 

Checking those internal voices and having a positive attitude while also still acknowledging any weaknesses and areas for improvement. Developing clarity of mind. All of this is needed to continue moving forward. Even with my recent struggles this has been possibly my best year so far. I do feel and recognize the changes and improvements. I know that there is still much work to be done, but I am excited to see were this journey takes me!

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

 

Another Week

Another week has past and I am still not getting much done as far as requirements go. I am instead taking care of myself as best as I can right now. I have been blessed and so grateful to have a good friend here in town helping out her convalescing father in-law. We have been able to take some nice long walks together which is so beneficial to my mental state.

Chiropractic and acupuncture treatments are gradually helping with my neck issues. Dealing with associated consistent headaches every day takes its own toll, but I am happy to say these are slowly diminishing. The tricky part is continuing to do all the things that help to improve my mental health even when the depression is not as apparent. I feel it there under the surface from time to time and know that there is still work to be done. 

My plan for this week is to add push ups, sit ups and forms back into my daily routine. A poke here and there may help, so feel free to message/poke me.

Namaste everyone!

This Will Pass

Every one has a breaking point and triggers that can affect their mental state. Lately I  have been struggling and realized a few days ago that I am mildly depressed. This has been building over time due to different factors. While anxiety has always been present, depression is less common for me, but does happen occasionally. 

I have been frequently tired for the past couple of months, but still managed to push myself and stay engaged until recently. The biggest hurdle currently has been a lack of motivation over the past 2 weeks and I am finding it difficult to keep up with all my requirements. 

I also recently discovered an issue with my neck caused by some severe muscle tightness on the right side of the neck, shoulder and upper back. This is causing my neck and head to noticeably pull to the right side and cause headaches daily which doesn't help with training or mental state.

The ability to self reflect and recognize when something is wrong is important in order to take the necessary steps towards feeling better. Self care is extremely important especially even if you don't notice any immediate benefits. The benefits are still there and are quietly building under the surface.  A friend reminded me of this yesterday and it was a good gentle poke while we were out for an beautiful fall evening walk together. 

I need to remind myself daily to take some extra time for myself and go for a walk, spend time in nature, make healthy food choices, practice positive affirmations and have gratitude for everything in my life. Developing some consistency along the way.

This will pass and I will be stronger for the insights and lessons learned.

Namaste everyone!

August Numbers

Updated numbers as of August 31st

No quitting ✔ 

Push ups 28291

Sit ups 29230

Lau Gar 851

Shoto 839

Sparring 137 X not on track

Kilometres 404 X not on track

Acts of Kindness 695

Mend a Relationship ✔

Journal min 1x week ✔

Featured Journal Posts ✔

Online Presence ✔

Tiger Challenge - ✔

Zero Unexcused Absences ✔ 

Excel in Curriculum - Instructors would need to judge

SRKF Projects - 2 projects, SRKF Virtual Auction & Livestream Table of Contents, Reno/engagement week

Mastery - Reading most days and starting to memorize

4 extra days with little activity in addition to weekly rest days.

Boot Camp

 

Kung Fu has taught me to embrace opportunity and step out of my comfort zone on a regular basis. Boot Camp was a perfect example of this. I hadn't planned on signing up when it was announced. There were some valid reasons and also excuses. 

I want to live life without regrets and not allow anxiety to rule my life. I feel that I have less control over the anxiety, but I do have control over the choices I make and the opportunities I say yes to.

Boot camp was a great experience! The meditation and the wrist lock sequence provided some insights and were a great way to start the day. And although the fight choreography was intimidating at first, it ended up being fun and was great to see what the other groups put together. The leadership seminar was a perfect addition during lunch. 

I found myself recognizing mini opportunities through out the day. Like drumming for instance. I was happy to just bang away on my flower pot. I am not musically inclined at all. The 3 star pattern was a challenge. I eventually started to get the hang of it though. Then opportunity tapped me on the shoulder,  saying "go try the big drum". Yes, no, was the battle inside my head. Yes won because I recognized it as an opportunity to step out of my comfort zone and I didn't want to have any regrets later.

The fitness test if my nemesis and even though there were times when I thought to myself "I could just pass on this section", there I go just jumping in and doing what I can. The shuttle and relay are my least favorite and it was very tempting to pass on them. By the time we were ready for the 2 km run, I am sure most of us were exhausted. I remember telling myself "I'm just going to walk this".  Instead, I pushed myself and ran/jogged sections. Each time I thought I couldn't do anymore, I dug deeper and attempted some semblance of a jog.

All in all a great experience!

Namaste everyone!

To Share or Not

I hadn't planned on sharing this, but changed my mind after a conversation with Sifu Rybak. 

I've been noticing for a while now that my horse stance deepens on its own at times. This is not a conscious effort of needing to lower, it happens naturally. Standing in a horse stance during a warm up for instance is where I first felt this happen. Especially with the punches, instead of my legs feeling fatigued and raising, I feel my body sinking lower and lower on its own accord. A very interesting and cool sensation. A move from dynamic correction, where in the moment I am aware of needed corrections and make the adjustments, to having my body naturally take over. I have also started to experience this while doing my forms. Although, not as noticeable yet because the transitions are occurring so quickly, but definitely happening.

Was I behind and just now catching up? Am I cruising ahead? Or right where I should be for my belt level? Does it even matter? It really shouldn't as long as I am applying myself. I do wonder sometimes though if others are experiencing similar things.

It is important to share because this is part of my journey. There is a sense of beginning to feel more and more comfortable about where I am at in my training. Building self confidence and trusting myself has also been increasing. The dots are connecting and I am beginning to feel better about my abilities which also builds confidence in other areas of my life.

What is everyone else discovering in their training? 

Namaste everyone!

Unintentional Pause

This past week I found it challenging to keep up with push ups, sit ups and forms reps. As much as I enjoy engaging and being part of the reno/maintenance week, it can be difficult to fit everything in. Especially with an added new job thrown in. I know that I could have pushed myself harder, but quality and mindfulness would have suffered. Maybe this is one of those times where the extra reps from previous months come in handy and having my focus engaged in other areas is ok. 

Camping with family and friends on the long weekend was a bonus this week. A much needed and great way to finish off the summer. When I think about where my priorities have been this past week and why, I am content with my decisions and what has or has not been accomplished. I am confident in my ability to pick up where I left off and continue moving forward.

Interesting that I don't see this as a needed reset. Instead of thinking about where my numbers could of been, I am grateful for the opportunities provided. Tuesday will be a continuation of a well developed routine allowing me to pick up where I left off.

Namaste everyone!

Not Your Typical Tool Box

Joining the IHC team we are all given a 1 year subscription towards mastery and as a signing bonus there is a shiny new tool box (list of requirements) to get us started on our path. Before the year even starts, we are presented with a starter set of tools (push ups & sit ups ) to get us going and help build some momentum for the coming year. Big heavy tools! 50,000 reps strong for each. It is up to us to learn how to wield and apply these tools. 50,000 is a big number and yet when broken down into small increments it can be one of the easiest and most beneficial tools if used correctly. 

Does success come from checking off each requirement or from discovering oneself within the process of tackling each requirement to the best of our ability? Even though the answer is obvious, it is something that is best discovered by each individual. Each requirement is a tool to add to our tool box. Some though can be more difficult to pick up and use. And even harder to see benefits if not using mindfully.

I had recently read through my journal posts from the past 6 months as a reminder of my journey so far. Through the process of growth and discovery I am realizing that my tool box has been constantly expanding. Working with the tools provided has helped me to discover and pick up new tools. These are tools that are specific to me. I can store these new tools and have them collect dust or I can place them somewhere visible. Reminding myself of their importance and keep them in working order. The following words, ideas and practices have all been added to my tool box.

1/2 tsp - every little bit counts                                   Take measure & evaluate

Mastery - read every day                                           Stillness

Progress Wisely                                                         Humility

Offer the best of myself                                             No regrets 

Consistency                                                                Expand my bubble

Be like water                                                              Don't give up

Trust the process                                                        Gratitude

Letting go                                                                   Patience, empathy & compassion

Reflect                                                                        Just do it!

Embrace & enjoyment                                               Correct, don't protect 

Commitment, choice & willingness                          30 seconds or less                                                                         

Namaste everyone!

Choice, Commitment and Willingness

I find it interesting how we can be presented with words, phrases or ideas that resonate with us at a particular moment in time. They are usually words and or ideas that we may even be familiar with. Seeds that have already been planted. I recently heard the words choice, commitment, and willingness used together in a sentence. This led me to thinking about the dictionary definitions and also reflecting on their deeper meanings. 

Signing up and taking part of something as important as the IHC team required choice, willingness and commitment. Everything that I do in life whether it is Kung Fu, work, community or relationships is comprised of these 3 words. 3 words that I have now added to my tool box. Checking in with myself regularly will help me to keep these words and ideals in front of me and keep me on track for success.

In addition to the definitions I have added some of my own thoughts on each word.

Choice

"an act of selecting or making a decision when faced with two or more possibilities" 

Internal and external choices

Check perspective before making choices

Commitment

"the state or quality of being dedicated to a cause, activity, etc"

"an agreement or pledge to do something in the future"

Commitments and contracts that we make with ourselves and others

Being reliable and accountable

Willingness

"the quality or state of being prepared to do something; readiness."

Saying "yes" to opportunities

Stepping outside of our comfort zone

Engagement and enthusiasm

By keeping these words in front of me at all times I am expanding my capacity to learn, grow and develop compassion for myself and others. And I mention compassion because there will be times where failure is present and compassion is needed to learn and grow. 

Namaste everyone!

Kung Fu is my Candy Shop

I have always found enjoyment and a sense of wonder in discovering new tidbits of knowledge and understanding. There was a time earlier this year when the moments of discoveries while training seemed to stop briefly. Because of the lack of shiny pieces I could feel myself becoming less motivated. Thankfully awareness was present and adjustments were made.

Orange/green belt was a huge pivot point for me. Blue belt has been a combination of speed train and at times slow motion with frequent discoveries and aha moments. I absolutely love it when pieces click and fall into place. Its that same sense of wonder I experienced as a child. Only now I am taking information and instruction and putting it into practice, making it my own and feeling it. I am also trying to dial it back a bit and not shout out my newest discovery all the time. I feel like a child in a candy shop!

As much as I love those aha moments, I am recently finding less need for them. I am trusting that training mindfully and consistently will continue to earn me more discoveries and aha moments. And if they aren't happening, then I am not training enough or in the right way, or there are components to focus on that need some extra work and time. 

Earlier this week I sensed another transition taking place. I feel myself stepping out of my bubble more. Instead of wanting and needing to do everything correctly I find myself embracing the discovery of incorrect thought processes. Asking questions and getting feedback are an essential part of learning and development. Don't get me wrong though, I do still want to be doing things correctly, but am more open to learning and embracing the process. And being kinder to myself.

Namaste everyone!

30 Seconds or Less!

30 seconds is such a small amount of time, and yet meaningful or necessary tasks can be completed in those 30 seconds or less. 

Asking myself at various times through out the day, "What can I do in 30 seconds or less?" has become a great tool. And the benefits can translate to multiple small accomplishments in a day. 

I often find myself leaving things for later so that I can get to more important tasks like heading to work or doing errands, etc. During especially busy days where I am coming and going or feeling unfocused and unproductive, the 30 second rule brings me to the present and gives me a feeling of accomplishment and control. The best part is the seemingly insignificant amount of time required. No commitment needed to carve out a larger block of time and no stress involved.

I may not be able to clean the kitchen in 30 seconds, but I can put something away or wipe a counter in 30 seconds or less.

I can't do 100+ pushups in 30 seconds, but I can do 10 - 15 pushups in 30 seconds or less.

I'm not able to drink a cup of coffee or tea in 30 seconds, but I can stop for a moment of stillness or gratitude in 30 seconds or less.

I may not have time for a meaningful conversation in 30 seconds, but I can project positive thoughts or give someone a hug in 30 seconds or less.

This is not about getting more done or being able to add more into my day. Instead I am taking advantage of those often overlooked and under used moments in time and making them count for something. I am transported into the present moment and it feels great!

All it takes is 30 seconds or less!

Namaste everyone!

July Numbers

Moving forward I will be posting my numbers and progress on my blog page. This will be available for anyone wanting to see, but will not be posted to Kwoon Talk. It always felt weird to me to post this to the team. Out there for all to see. Its a bit like hey..! Look at me. Which is not something that I am very comfortable with. And the aspect of humility feels like it is getting a bit lost in the process. 

There is definitely value in keeping track of my progress and being transparent as far as what I am doing so I will continue to post my progress to my own blog site which is still accessible for others to see if they choose to. 

Stillness is happening each day, but I would still like to see an increase in frequency. Will continue to work on this and build the length and number of times each day.

My kilometres are mostly tracked as intentional and anything that is not typical or routine movements back and forth at home or work. I had made the decision to not wear a fitness band at the start of the year and thought I would be farther along than I am. Looks like I will need to add more into my day to improve the numbers.

Sparring is starting to improve. I have some ideas on this to increase the progress. This is one of my least comfortable aspects of Kung Fu and therefore a very valuable tool to utilize and to improve on.

Updated numbers as of July 31st

No quitting ✔ 

Push ups 24499

Sit ups 25340

Lau Gar 722

Shoto 720

Sparring 137 X not on track

Kilometres 354 X not on track

Acts of Kindness 629

Mend a Relationship ✔

Journal min 1x week ✔

Featured Journal Posts ✔

Online Presence ✔

Tiger Challenge - ✔

Zero Unexcused Absences ✔ 

Excel in Curriculum - Instructors would need to judge

SRKF Projects - 2 projects, SRKF Virtual Auction & Livestream Table of Contents

Mastery - Reading most days and starting to memorize

Namaste everyone!

Decluttering

I've taken on the task of helping my 86 year old dad declutter his house this summer. The decluttering has also led to assistance with banking and bill organization etc. I knew at the start that this was going to be a time consuming project. At the beginning my thought process was to go in and just get the job done.

Day 1 started with dad's desire to clean up the breakfast room. Art supplies and paper everywhere. Task completed and dad was pleased with the result. We've since moved from there to the kitchen, the dining room, the living room and now we are into our 3rd day of dealing with the den/office area. 

I'll usually bring a salad or a home baked treat to share out on the deck and then we get to work. The time that we are spending together is precious and so beneficial for both of us. I know this helps to motivate dad and give him some direction in what was becoming an overwhelming situation. 

I have been rewarded with lessons of patience as I deal with frustration and learning to adapt to an evolving situation. Some days end up being more about computer help with forgotten passwords etc. I also have to remind myself that what I envision is not necessarily the same for my dad. I practice minimalism and dad is no where near that same ideal. So I am careful to always ask before putting an item into the donate pile. When he eventually moves into a smaller place I know we will be doing this all over again.

Often our time sorting through things leads to discussions about the item and its history. Dad enjoys sharing the information and I enjoy the history and quality time spent together. And I know that at times I am a bit too pushy, but if I wasn't, very little would be accomplished. Its about knowing when to push as I help him to see the benefits and when to back off. 

I really feel that Kung Fu has helped me to increase my ability to step back from a situation and see things from different perspectives. Understanding that we are all at different levels of awareness, ability and understanding. What works for me doesn't necessarily work for the person in front of me at any given time. And when I do get frustrated I am learning to step back and readjust my perspective and come at it from a different angle. 

Namaste everyone!

Correct, Don't Protect

I recall at the start of the year reading the last 3 words of 'Mastery' by Stuart Emery and feeling at the time that they really weren't necessary. Why add "Correct, don't protect" at the end? I am now beginning to understand how powerful and important these 3 little words are.

Even though my training and achievements have been on track this year, I have been struggling with some negative feelings off and on. A bit like a yo yo effect. Mostly I am able to recognize the low spots and recover quickly. Lately though I have been feeling like a bit of a "fake." These are the times when I feel alone even with a strong supportive team, as this is an internal battle that I fight. 

Feelings of being "fake" or not being enough is a way of invalidating and protecting myself from potential future failures and moving forward. I know that if I allow myself to continue with these thoughts and feelings I am giving them more power. I need to recognize when this is happening and make corrections without invalidating myself and my achievements. 

There are days when mastery shines or mediocrity rules and then there are the days where a combination of both take place. I think that it is those days where both are present that create this feeling of being "fake." Why I am on this journey towards mastery if I allow so much mediocrity into my life? I know what I want to and need to be doing and yet I am secretly eating chips and ice cream with my friend mediocrity at my side, even though earlier that same day I entertained mastery and completed all my push ups, sit ups and forms reps. 

Is mediocrity a way for my mind and body to protect itself? Protecting those comfortable bad habits from being ripped apart and molded into something better? Protecting me from potential failure, or expanding my bubble and leading to greater success?

Sometimes the opponent that we are in battle with is ourself.  Remember to stay calm, assess the situation, breath and make the necessary corrections. And always endeavour to do the best you can in any given moment. Also recognize that your best may be different from moment to moment depending on the situation. If mastery feels overwhelming at times then maybe think more about working towards consistency as you grow into mastery.

Corrections and adjustments are an ongoing necessity as we travel this path. I am committing to making these corrections with love, gratitude and a large measure of joy!

Namaste everyone!

June Numbers

I was able to make some adjustments and improve my numbers for June. I feel that I have a decent routine going with a few tweaks needed. I also made a change to my personal requirement of stillness each day and am feeling better about this. Stillness is back on track and happening more regularly with more work to be done though.

Updated numbers as of June 30th

No quitting ✔ 

Push ups 20374

Sit ups 20980

Lau Gar 571

Shoto 574

Sparring 87 X

Kilometers 269

Acts of Kindness 557

Mend a Relationship ✔

Journal min 1x week ✔

Featured Journal Posts ✔

Online Presence ✔

Tiger Challenge - ✔

Zero Unexcused Absences ✔ 

Excel in Curriculum - Instructors would need to judge

SRKF Projects - 2 projects, SRKF Virtual Auction & Livestream Table of Contents

Mastery - Reading most days and starting to memorize

Namaste everyone!

Mindful Recording

Recording my numbers helps me to know where I am at, whats working, what isn't and when adjustments need to be made. I realized as I sat down this morning to tally up my numbers for June that there is another component to recording our numbers and achievements. I'm talking about mindfulness. 

I could simply keep track each day and add everything at the end of the week or month without considering the results and taking the appropriate action. This would not be mindful and there would be much less benefit. I may have totals for the year, but those totals would most likely be lower due to a lack of mindfulness. 

Consider everything that is taught and learned from our "history books." Without those history books and archives, there would be no record of events and therefore very little knowledge and learning to be gained. Some of the same mistakes may be made, opportunities lost and ripples diminished.

A person that eats healthy foods is going to benefit from the food they put into their body even if it is just habit and not done with much mindfulness. Someone else that eats similar healthy foods in a completely mindful manner will gain even more benefits. Benefits like gratitude, understanding of what is best for your body, increased energy and more.

I've tried a few different ways to keep track over the years and find paper is my go to.  I record everything I've accomplished each day and then add it to the wall calendar in my office at home. This also helps to keep it in front of me as I walk by several times a day. I also find there is value in adding the totals manually at the end of the month because I need look at each day and I can see where there were gaps and why. Doing this gives me a better understanding of how not training and/or not recording my progress impacts the final results. I also see the days with big numbers and think wow! Was this simply a case of more time or increased motivation and engagement?

Going forward in addition to recording my numbers I will also be jotting down some notes each day to get a better sense of what impacted those number for better or worse. I'm thinking I may need to find a bigger calendar. 

Namaste everyone!

Asking Questions

There is a natural progression that we each experience throughout our training as martial artists. But, in addition to that, there is our own individual self awareness and improvement. Unique to each of us. I remember thinking the first year I had joined the IHC that somehow without even realizing it at the time, I had actually signed up for a year long self discovery and improvement workshop. And, it turned out to be the best decision ever!! 

I continue to find it truly amazing all of the things that I am learning in Kung Fu. Things that I never would have thought had anything to do with learning a martial art. Imagine if you were a brand new student in Kung Fu and you were told that as part of your training you would learn to journal and blog regularly, reflect more deeply, become more mindful, improve your question asking skills and much, much more. As I sit here writing, I am reminded again of all the benefits of training at Silent River Kung Fu. 

For the past 6 months or so I've been learning and working towards formatting better questions. Asking the right question takes some thought and requires a bit of skill. Why is the question being asked? Is it because you know the answer and your ego needs some stroking? Is it because you think you know the answer and need to know if you are correct? Or are you gathering information to increase your knowledge and skill set? Also ask yourself if you are looking for a quick easy answer before even trying to apply your existing knowledge and skill. 

This past week I've been more focused on a sticky part in one of my forms. After working on it numerous times I'm no closer to solving the issue. I tried to apply my current knowledge regarding transitions, six harmonies, and expansion and contraction. I know that part of the issue is my  right knee, but I feel like at this point in my training I should be able to figure things out based on what I know and then fine tune with help from a Sifu.  

Yes, I know this is a perfect time to book a one on one and ask a question. The trouble is I was having a difficult time figuring out what the question should be because I didn't know what the problem was and where to even start. What I took away from this is that sometimes a simple request for help may be needed and another set of eyes to provide feedback. There is a a balance point between figuring things out for yourself and asking for help or asking the right question. What you know or think you know to be true may be more difficult to apply in a specific circumstance and set of variables.

I continue to be amazed and humbled as I travel this path.

Namaste!

Take 22 ...ish!

I had anticipated that the questions for the virtual demo would present a bit of a challenge and I wasn't wrong. Oral vocabulary is something that I struggle with so I am grateful for the opportunity to practice this in a way that allows for errors and numerous retakes. There were some comical moments and a few frustrating ones as well, but all was good in the end. The not so techie me even figured out Dropbox. Yay!

Thank you to Ms. Lee for being my weapons partner. Practicing and video taping our forms together was a great experience. We found a perfect little park to practice in and had to get a little creative with the rocks. Note: no rocks were harmed in the filming our video. All were returned back to their original homes to the best of our ability. LOL 

It can be challenging producing a video with 2 people in it where both participants feel good about the finished product. Getting that great video usually means numerous retakes. I think our best video came after redirecting our focus to push ups and sit ups and then coming back and doing one last weapons video. We finished just as the sun was starting to set. It's all about team work, opportunity and what you do with it. Can't wait to see the final product!

Namaste!

Moving Forward

"The way to move forward is often daunting and sometimes even scary. However, not moving forward can be discouraging and is a lot like giving up. "

This came to me the other day as I looked at some struggles I've posted about recently. Since then I've implemented a simple plan that allows me to add on some extra training components without feeling overwhelmed.  I am not usually someone that gives up and I don't intent to start even though that is where my mind takes me at times. 

"Don't give up, get up!"

Namaste!

Opposing Sides

Today I was having a great day. I went for a walk with my dad and helped him with some cleaning and then got to spend time babysitting my grandson. There was even some ice cream involved sitting under a tree together. I even managed to get some training in before class and then things went south. I know that if I want to progress there is so much more that I need to practice and focus on besides the team requirements and personal goals. 

There is this little voice on one side acknowledging all the progress and success I have had throughout this pandemic and being supportive of my journey. And then on the other side there is the not so nice voice that points out everything that is lacking, what it's going to take to make improvements and questions what I am doing in Kung Fu. There is so much lacking! Am I just fooling myself? Unfortunately those opposing sides like to battle each other from time to time. 

If I had a good day and wasn't feeling stressed, why has that nasty voice reared its ugly head? For me this is usually the product of a combination of too much stress and anxiety. So I though about it and realized there is the underlying stress of trying to find a new job and now attending classes in person instead of virtually. I do mostly enjoy being back at the kwoon, but hiding out in my basement training space is much more in my comfort zone. And the idea of full contact very soon does not fill my heart with joy either, so really what am I doing? The benefits of training at Silent River Kung Fu have been so huge and yet I am not seeing a clear path forward and am getting tired of this ongoing internal battle. 

And yet if I strip away some of the emotion and think about things logically, I can see some value in the not so nice voice. Some of what that voice has to say is accurate. I need to strip away the feelings that don't serve me, evaluate and take action on some truths pointed out. 

Namaste!

To Train or Not!

The week had almost finished and here it was now Saturday and I really had very little idea as to what I was going to blog about. I even considered using the day as a partial rest day. It's funny how we can tell ourselves before the day is even done that we want a rest even if it is not needed. I took an hour or so to walk the dog and enjoy the weather and then realized that I still had time and energy left to train. So I did. That training led to some reflections and self realizations as well as new discoveries. And of course content for a blog. 

There was a time not to long ago where I lost some motivation due to the lack of aha moments in my training. These aha's usually happen fairly frequently for me, so after a period of 3 weeks or more with nothing new being discovered I found myself a bit lost and uninspired. Just going through the motions is not a great feeling. I have since learned to just push through these "dry spells' and take the time to work on areas that are needing extra attention. Sometime it can simply be a matter of focusing on my breathing while going through a form or focusing on a specific section. 

I happy to report those aha moments and little discoveries are back. I will always be drawn to the bright new shiny pennies of discovery, but am learning to appreciate and understand the value of patience and the art of  creating a well worn artifact full of stories and wisdom. Even those bright shiny pennies eventually become worn and full of stories to tell. Firstly though they need to be discovered and then applied. There may come a time when the discoveries and aha moments come less frequently and I need to be able to continue developing my art with intent and enjoyment. The "dry spells" give me time and space to refine and embrace the art of Kung Fu.

This brings me to where I am at with both my weapon form and my hand form:

Weapon Form - Shoto

I had been starting to feel a bit disconnected with the Shoto recently. I know the form and I feel that my stances are pretty good (always room for improvement though). However, flow within the form needs some work and developing a connection with the weapon while having control. There are times when I feel the shoto and I are separate entities not in sync.

I've been working on bringing the weapon in a bit closer to my body which seems to help and also imagining the shoto as an extension of my arm. This works best when I am aware the shoto is in my hand and what it is doing, but being more focused on the hand itself rather than the weapon. I find that this helps to connect the two and helps with the flow.

A shorter and seemingly easy form can be deceptive and actually much more complex. Of course all forms contain a unending amount of detail and complexities that the untrained eye is unaware of. This is one of the reasons that I love forms so much. Never ending learning and discoveries!

Hand Form - Lao Gar

I'm feeling pretty good about where I am currently at with Lao Gar, but I know I'll be working on this form until the end of time. There is so much complexity in this form that 1000 reps will barely scratch the surface. The ball throw again is giving me trouble. Just for different reasons. I have been having difficulty with keeping my centre along with the contractions and expansions in this sequence. There is so much going on there. Good thing for One on Ones as Master Brinker was able to help me out with this. Now I need to apply the knowledge. I am finding that knowing and doing are very different.

Sticky parts of forms can create hours and hours of extra training for me. I am like a dog with a bone that won't give it up. After a few days of repetitive ball throws and not seeing much improvement I decided to trust that it will come as intended. I have the knowledge and the ability. I am now feeling more at ease and I have learned form past experience that as long as I give it some extra attention, use what I know to be true and keep working on the problem section, all will be resolved. Happy to say that the ball throw is starting to improve and I am getting closer to that feeling of ease and flow!

A few weeks ago Master Brinker mentioned a high back stance in Lao Gar I. I was a bit confused at the time as I was doing a cat stance. Did this mean that I had been in the wrong stance all this time? So I asked the question and it was explained as a bit of a hybrid of the two stances. Hmmm..., ok. There was a bit more to the explanation which I am still processing. In the meantime I took a look at that section of the form and just wasn't seeing or feeling the high back stance. So, again I'm just going to trust the process and file the information towards the front of my brain to access as needed. Fast forward to this week and all of a sudden I am getting the smallest sense of a variation of a high back stance in Lao Gar I. And on Saturday while doing my reps it was stronger. I isolated the relevant section and yes, I could see and feel a slight difference. I am still processing what is going on with this but I feel that the "hybrid high back stance" provides a bit more distance between me and my imaginary opponent as opposed to using a traditional cat stance. Hopefully I'm on the right track.

I think that my biggest takeaways are to be patient with myself and trust the process, trust myself and value the evolving art of Kung Fu.

"I am a blue belt in Lu Ping An Chuan Fa at Silent River Kung Fu." This is what I say to myself every morning. I also remind myself of this when ever I train and have recently started saying "I am a brown belt in Lu Ping An Chuan Fa" to help create that mindset and push myself farther. 

Namaste!

Numbers - May

I had been planning to post an update at the end of May as to where I am at with the team requirements and my own as well, but that didn't happen. Better late than not at all. There was a bit of a decline in the month of May. It is amazing how a day here and there with less effort adds up quickly. I am not going to play catch up but rather look forward and plan how I can make adjustments to my routine to serve me better and build success.

One of my personal goals is to implement 5 minutes of stillness into each day for 100 days. I am finding this to be more difficult than anticipated. I could try building it into my routine at a set time, but I think that I would be better served adding stillness into my day in smaller increments throughout the day. I will keep everyone updated as to how this goes.

Updated numbers as of the May 31st

No quitting ✔ 

Push ups 15735

Sit ups 16446

Lau Gar 391

Shoto 432

Sparring 83

Kilometers 203

Acts of Kindness 476

Mend a Relationship ✔

Journal min 1x week ✔

Featured Journal Posts ✔

Online Presence ✔

Lion Dance - Working on it

Tiger Challenge - ✔

Zero Unexcused Absences ✔ 

Excel in Curriculum - Instructors would need to judge

SRKF Projects - 2 projects, SRKF Virtual Auction & Livestream Table of Contents

Mastery - Reading most days and starting to memorize

Namaste everyone!

Routine

So my numbers for May have dropped a bit and I am not surprised. I was aware that this was happening. I had not fallen off the wagon completely, but definitely a decline. The warmer weather and planting season has created additional tasks. Having set goals for the year and being on the team requires that I make adjustments as required. This has caused me to evaluate the meaning of routine/ schedule and what that means for me personally.

A routine allows me to feel in control of choices and what I do or don't do. It gives me a feeling of control. Keeping track of numbers for the month helps me to see where I am at and where I need to focus. I don't normally thrive on a strict schedule and I much prefer to just wing it. But I know focus, and productivity are improved when organized. 

However, not all routines are created equal, and failing to examine or alter our habits can have a limiting effect on our lives. Moving through a series of them can set us on autopilot throughout our day, which can lead us to lose touch with ourselves and our immediate experience.

For example, scrolling through our phone can seem pretty routine, but we may be missing out on sights, sounds, or even smells that would engage us in some way, inspire a specific feeling, or spark our imagination.

June has been a reset for me. An opportunity to start fresh. I see all of my requirements as a reset. Keep the structure and play with the components. Change things up and actively seek out new areas for improvement.

Again, it comes down to balance and developing a routine that serves me while providing flexibility as needed. 

Namaste,

Michele Ward

Tiger Challenge

This past week has mostly been about preparing for the Tiger Challenge. Two weeks ago I had even started working on a creative musical form. I always enjoy creating either a hand or weapon form using music as a base. Unfortunately I decided to abandon the idea as I hadn't started early enough to feel confident in my ability to not mix up all my forms. I know there has to be a healthy balance of pushing myself and knowing when I may be piling on too much.

I feel like I have a normal amount a nervousness leading up to and then performing in the Tiger Challenge. It is the added anxiety that can be over the top if not managed. And this is something that I am getting better at. For me eating healthy is always important, but especially the week leading up to the challenge. No room for errors here. I don't know if there are ever enough reps to feel fully prepared for the Tiger Challenge. Sometimes the more I do, the more pieces I discover that are needing attention and improvement. The key is to narrow my focus and choose 1 or 2 areas to work on and log the rest for later. This is good though as we are always evolving and learning. 

The tools that help me during the day of the Tiger Challenge consist of a bit of practice, (just enough to clear any cobwebs that developed overnight), dynamic stretches and breathing techniques. I also incorporate some rest/me time at some point . I also like to fill in any extra waiting time with some busy work to take the focus off what is about to take place and just enjoy the day.

I feel good about my performance and nothing went horribly wrong. Anxiety and a healthy amount of nerves were present and I feel were well managed. In the end the there is a huge check mark, a smiley face, claps and hugs for myself and everyone else that participated and judged the event. Another opportunity to step outside our comfort zone for many of us, in a safe and supportive environment and show that we can persevere, adapt and do it exceptionaly well!

A Tiger Challenger over Zoom is not the same as being in person at the Kwoon, but there is a truly unique and special quality to an event done in this way during this challenging time in our lives. Instructors, participants and parents behind the scenes supporting their children, all came together. The challenges that we face in our many different training environments, internet issues and the constant need to adapt added to our shared experience and makes the efforts that much more rewarding. 

Thank you to all the Sifus that organized the event and thank you to Mrs Ferris and her cast of participants that took part in a very special video that was incorporated into a very special day! 

A big thank you and congratulations to all!

👏👏 😊🎉🎉

What's Your Speed?

What speed are you traveling at?

Are you speeding ahead and loving the ride or are you speeding ahead and mostly focused on the destination? Do you find yourself stuck in traffic, horns blaring, road blocks and delays? Or are you cruising down a country road at just the right speed, stopping along the way to enjoy the scenery and making adjustments to your trajectory? Most likely it's all of the above at different times and that's ok. As long as you recognize what is happening. Sometimes you just need to get off the road, take some time to focus on your breathing and access where and how you want to continue your journey. And remember, often times a wrong turn can be the best turn!

I am finding lately with the nicer weather that it is getting harder to stay committed to the team requirements and my own personal goals. I'm feeling at times that I just want to get out of the car and park it in the garage to focus on other stuff. Instead I add more fuel and keep moving forward. I ask myself if it would really be so bad if I took an extra rest day here and there? There are days when this is very appealing and even needed, but I also worry that I would end up stalled. While there have been some days this month with lower numbers, I never come to a complete stop. And I am getting better at recognizing what is needed to keep everything sustainable.  

Be present to what is directly in front of you

Look ahead, be aware of potential road blocks

Don't allow yourself to become paralyzed by your goal

Don't look where you don't want to go

Adjust you speed as needed

Find the right momentum for the current situation

Eat well and maintain your vehicle

Encourage travel companions

Take measure and embrace the experiences along the way

Extra time to rest is good if it serves you and is done purposefully

Reflect, learn and continue moving forward

No regrets

Appreciate your efforts

Love your results!

Namaste everyone!

New Goal

I've recently started to seriously think about grading for my black belt (yikes!!!) and have decided that my goal is to grade next year. It is strange how this happened for me so suddenly. Black Belt grading has been in the back of my mind for the past few years, but until recently I was still thinking it would be another 2 or 3 years away. 

So what changed? I think the biggest change for me has been joining the team again this year and then all the effort I have been putting into the requirements. The momentum and growth that I have been experiencing has inspired me and I feel now is the time to continue pushing myself and ride the wave.

A week ago Logan and I went through most of the Black Belt fitness test to see where I was at and get a feel for everything. The chin ups and flex arm hang are my nemesis. Kind of like the box jump for Ms. Ferris. I'm standing on the stool, holding onto the bar and practically freeze. Just can't seem to make my body do anything. Oh well, results were recorded and now I have a starting point to improve upon. Some results were better than expected and others were not surprising at all. The plan is to run through the fitness test every 2 weeks to help build endurance, track improvement and work on technique.

I am slowly starting to figure out what works best for me regarding extra training. I've started using a blank calendar that I fill in each day with the stretches, punches, horse stance and kicks, etc. Right now I am mostly working on stuff from the fitness test and then throwing in some things from the Livestream video lessons and random other stuff that pops into my head. Recording everything onto the calendar helps me to see what I am doing, how often and where any gaps may be. And I am finding that there is a higher level of engagement and enjoyment with what I'm doing.

This nicer weather as we head into the summer months is going to make it challenging to stay motivated and train consistently. I may even have to start getting up earlier. Yikes! Maybe not the 5 AM club, but possibly a 6 AM club?

Namaste 

Letting Go!

I've seen a common pattern popping up for me this year. An opportunity for growth and expansion in my life. I am talking about the act of "letting go". For whatever reason I have become more aware of this in my life and am working consciously to apply tools to help with the process in order to move forward in my training, personal growth, work and relationships, etc. 

At a quick glance "letting go" appears on the surface to be a relatively easy task. But I know that for many people their heavy baggage comes from just burying most things rather than truly "letting go" ultimately creating a lack of freedom and space to move forward.

My identified areas to let go:

• the past or what used to be
• mistakes, actions or words
• things we have no control over,  
• judgements or negative thoughts, 
• undesirable outcomes

Steps to letting go:

• Firstly I need to recognize and acknowledge when something is not serving me.
• Allow myself to feel emotions without dwelling on things. If I don't allow this to happen, I am just stuffing everything inside. 
• Practice forgiveness towards myself and others.
• Recognize and embrace gratitude for the opportunity to learn and grow.
• Create a positive affirmation

By letting go, space is created for positive energy to come into my life and those around me. Letting go helps me to live in the moment and act now rather than spending unproductive time in the past or being worried about the future.

Namaste 

Numbers Update

Updated numbers as of the April 30th

No quitting ✔ 

Push ups 11970

Sit ups 12260

Lau Gar 296

Shoto 344

Sparring 78

Kilometers 127

Acts of Kindness 373

Mend a Relationship ✔

Journal min 1x week ✔

Featured Journal Posts ✔

Online Presence ✔

Public Performances - Not yet

Lion Dance - Working on it

Tiger Challenge - hopefully

Zero Unexcused Absences ✔ 

Excel in Curriculum - Instructors would need to judge

SRKF Projects - 2 projects, SRKF Virtual Auction & Livestream Table of Contents

Mastery - Reading every day and starting to memorize

Personal goals are on track so far. Currently working on a 100 day challenge of 5 minutes of stillness each day. (30 days completed) Stillness is something that I need to consciously remember to complete every day. Should be easy to do, but I find myself always doing, watching or reading something.

Namaste!

My Kung Fu Garden

 

At the end of class a few weeks ago, Sifu Rybak had asked why we practice Kung Fu and also commented that many of us attend classes out of "habit". I know that my reason for training in Kung Fu is it helps me to grow as a person and be a better version of myself while also building connections. 

Kung Fu plants a diverse variety of seeds that encourages growth in all areas of my life. Not all germinate quickly, but every seed has the potential for growth. Community, environment, self awareness, mindfulness, compassion and empathy are just some of the many plants growing in my Kung Fu garden. 

Why I train in Kung Fu is clear, but hearing Sifu Rybak use the word "habit" caused me to pause and think. At the time I felt that even though there are many great habits, in this case I was seeing it as somewhat negative. Repetitive and at times just going through the motions because it had become habit. Realizing that I mostly attend classes and watch the online videos each week out of habit bothered me. I have been pondering an answer as to why? Surely all the positives and this beautiful Kung Fu garden that I have grown is a reflection of that good habit? So is it my perspective, my level of engagement or mindfulness? Or something else entirely? What seeds are sitting there waiting for the right combination of elements to encourage growth? 

Anxiety and self compassion may be part of the answer. I find that compassion for others is much easier than self compassion. This is a seed in my garden that is in need of some nurturing. Then there are the weeds of anxiety popping up that tend to choke out the blissful flowers of enjoyment. If I can focus more on the enjoyment, I may be better equipped to push aside the anxiety thus creating a more enjoyable head and heart space.

Training in Kung Fu at SRKF is definitely a keystone habit that has enormous potential to trigger numerous other good habits, thereby creating a ripple effect in our lives and all of those that we come into contact with, either directly or indirectly.

Namaste